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But We Loved podcast

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As a gay kid growing up Catholic, in conservative Texas, Jordan Gonsalves knew nothing about queer history. Now, as a journalist, he’s searching for the stories he craved when he was coming of age. Through intimate interviews with LGBTQ+ elders, Jordan uncovers the untold stories of queer history. And in the process, he discovers the role models he always needed and the wisdom they’ve been waiting to pass down.

As a gay kid growing up Catholic, in conservative Texas, Jordan Gonsalves knew nothing about queer history. Now, as a journalist, he’s searching for the stories he craved when he was coming of age. Through intimate interviews with LGBTQ+ elders, Jordan uncovers the untold stories of queer history. And in the process, he discovers the role models he always needed and the wisdom they’ve been waiting to pass down.

 

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#26

The Founder of the Trevor Project on Suicide Prevention

This episode contains frank discussion on suicide. If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, you can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988. In 1998, Celeste Lecesne co-founded the Trevor Project, the nation’s leading suicide prevention organization for queer youth. It was born out of an oscar-winning suicide awareness film he wrote called "Trevor." Celeste recounts how the film was actually based on his own life. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

06 Nov 2024

40 MINS

40:22

06 Nov 2024

#25

Compton's Cafeteria: The Riot Before Stonewall

Susan Stryker is a historian who unearthed the story of Compton's Cafeteria, the first known full-scale queer riot against police harassment in American history. She describes the events of the riot and how her discovery impacted her own life. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

30 Oct 2024

33 MINS

33:41

30 Oct 2024

#24

Voguing Goes Global

Luis Camacho Xtravaganza was one of the ballroom dancers who choreographed Madonna's music video for "Vogue." It took voguing from the underground to the mainstream. He relives this complicated time — the rush of stardom and the consequences that came with it. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

23 Oct 2024

40 MINS

40:53

23 Oct 2024

#23

The History of Ballroom Culture

Rayceen Pendarvis is an elder in the House of Pendavis. Rayceen recounts the beginnings of ballroom, how it exploded in the early 90s thanks to Madonna and “Paris is Burning,” and how, simultaneously, it began collapsing from within as AIDS ravaged the community. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

16 Oct 2024

38 MINS

38:17

16 Oct 2024

#22

When Gay People Die, How Are We Remembered?

Larry Colton was profoundly impacted by the AIDS crisis in San Francisco. He reflects on the most difficult loss he endured and what he legacy he was left with. Vote for us to win our first Signal Award  [here] (https://vote.signalaward.com/PublicVoting?utm_campaign=feed&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=later-linkinbio#/2024/individual-episodes/general/lgbtq) ! For "Best LGBTQ+ Podcast Episode." Voting closes Oct. 17th. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

09 Oct 2024

38 MINS

38:32

09 Oct 2024

#21

Addiction in the LGBTQ+ Community

Experts say 20-30% of the LGBTQ community abuses substances. Donald Flowers Jr. is a gay man who was addicted to alcohol, cocaine, crystal meth, and sex. He reflects on his struggles with addiction and his journey to sob See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

02 Oct 2024

35 MINS

35:44

02 Oct 2024

#20

The Deadly Fire & The Gay Man that Changed New Orleans

Get your ticket to our free live show  [here] (https://queervoicesnyc.eventive.org/schedule/66ea61e0be8f27004ff241ea) , this Sunday, September 29th at 2:30pm in NYC! Stewart Butler shaped much of the vibrant queer culture in New Orleans, through his political activism. He was driven by the loss of 32 queer people in the Upstairs Lounge Fire in 1972 — a fire that he witnessed with his own eyes. Frank Perez is an LGBTQ+ historian who recounts Stewart’s story for us. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

25 Sep 2024

39 MINS

39:55

25 Sep 2024

#19

The Escapism of Drag

Sherry Vine is a legendary drag queen that came up in the 90s, in NYC. She's aware of drag's super power: helping queer people escape from the pain of their lives. She was at the center of that during the AIDS crisis. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

18 Sep 2024

33 MINS

33:09

18 Sep 2024

#18

America's First "Major" Gay Mayor

In 2009, Annise Parker became the first openly gay mayor of a major American city. As mayor, her signature piece of equal rights legislation famously failed — but it drove her to help elect more LGBTQ+ Americans into office than ever before. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

11 Sep 2024

31 MINS

31:12

11 Sep 2024

#17

The Gay Origins of House Music

Lori Branch was one of the pioneering DJs of house music in the 80s. She reflects on the queer origins of the genre, how this history was erased, and why house music still resonates with so many queer people today. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

04 Sep 2024

44 MINS

44:28

04 Sep 2024

#16

The History of Gay Cruising

Alex Espinoza is the author of the only official history on gay cruising:  [Cruising: An Intimate History of a Radical Pastime] (https://a.co/d/bR9566r) . He reflects on how cruising helped him find self confidence and led him to the love he had always been searching for. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

14 Aug 2024

38 MINS

38:17

14 Aug 2024

#15

Studio 54 & Disco's Impact on Queerness

Studio 54 was much more than a club. It was the embodiment of disco — a movement that empowered LGBTQ+ Americans and prepared them for a fight they never saw coming. Hal Rubenstein, a fashion icon, was a regular there. He remembers how the highs of the 70s sustained him through the lows of the 80s. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

07 Aug 2024

34 MINS

34:25

07 Aug 2024

#14

The Stroll: Sex Work in the LGBTQ+ Community, Pt. 2

In Part 2 of our episode with Tabytha Gonzalez, she details the consequences of her sex work: a harrowing drug addiction followed by 16 years of incarceration. And she reflects on how years later, she’d return to The Stroll with a new purpose. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

31 Jul 2024

26 MINS

26:25

31 Jul 2024

#13

The Stroll: Sex Work in the LGBTQ+ Community, Pt. 1

Tabytha Gonzalez is a trans woman who worked on The Stroll in the 90s, a historic area of NYC known for sex work. She recounts the freedom that sex work gave her — and the costs that came with it. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

24 Jul 2024

33 MINS

33:01

24 Jul 2024

#12

Banned At Work: The Military’s Ban on Gays & Lesbians

Danny Ingram was a gay soldier who had to stay closeted during the military’s ban on gay people in the 80s. But when his partner began to die of AIDS, he realized he couldn't stay silent any longer. He decided to fight to end the ban — and 17 years later, he would win. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

17 Jul 2024

37 MINS

37:20

17 Jul 2024

#11

Before & After Pulse Nightclub

Brandon Wolf survived the Pulse nightclub shooting in 2016. Hailing from rural Oregon, Brandon reflects on how the club — and the people in it — changed his life forever. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

10 Jul 2024

36 MINS

36:33

10 Jul 2024

#10

The Love Story That Legalized Gay Marriage

Jim Obergefell was the plaintiff in the case that legalized gay marriage for all of America in 2015 (Obergefell v. Hodges). Behind that case was a story of love and loss. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

03 Jul 2024

38 MINS

38:10

03 Jul 2024

#9

The “Only” Gay in the Military

A lawsuit meant Zoe Dunning was the only LGBTQ+ person allowed in the miltiary for 13 years. Compliant at first, she would tranform into one of the most vocal opponents against the military's ban on gays. She would eventually stand next to President Obama as he abolished the ban for good. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

26 Jun 2024

38 MINS

38:00

26 Jun 2024

#8

The AIDS Love Story You Never Heard Part 2

Jason Prefontaine's father died from AIDS related complications. Decades later, he reunited with him in an unexpected way. Special thank you to Trent Straube for originally writing about Chris & Jason in POZ magazine in 2021. You can read his article [here] (https://www.poz.com/article/first-love-lost-aids-enjoys-unexpected-new-chapter) . See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

19 Jun 2024

38 MINS

38:33

19 Jun 2024

#7

The AIDS Love Story You Never Heard Part 1

Chris Pimentel lost his first love to AIDS in 1991. But 30 years later, that love story got an unexpected new chapter. Part 2 of this love story drops next week. Special thank you to Trent Straube for originally writing about Chris & Jason in POZ magazine in 2021. You can read his article [here] (https://www.poz.com/article/first-love-lost-aids-enjoys-unexpected-new-chapter) . See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

12 Jun 2024

41 MINS

41:17

12 Jun 2024

#6

Coming Out On YouTube (ft. Ingrid Nilsen)

Coming out on YouTube has defined a generation of young queer people. In 2015, Ingrid Nilsen posted one of the most viewed [coming out videos] (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eh7WRYXVh9M) of all time. She reflects on the positive and negative impact it’s had on her life and millions of others. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

05 Jun 2024

37 MINS

37:53

05 Jun 2024

#5

Mr. Marriage: The Man Behind Gay Marriage

Evan Wolfson was a major figure in the fight for gay marriage in America. He shares how - ironically - he never thought he'd get married, what changed his mind, and how his 32 year fight for marriage equality changed America. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

29 May 2024

41 MINS

41:44

29 May 2024

#4

The Lesbians Who Led the AIDS Response

Jean Carlomusto is an Emmy-nominated documentarian. But in the 1980s, she was a scrappy filmmaker documenting the AIDS crisis for ACT UP. She reflects on the impact that lesbians like her had in responding to the deadly epidemic that was mostly affecting gay men.  See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

22 May 2024

45 MINS

45:04

22 May 2024

#3

Meet Your Host (with Eric Marcus)

In this special episode, we learn more about our host, Jordan Gonsalves, in an interview with Eric Marcus from [Making Gay History] (https://makinggayhistory.com/) . Jordan shares his coming out story, the inspiration behind But We Loved, and what listeners can expect from future episodes. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

15 May 2024

27 MINS

27:37

15 May 2024

#2

That One Night at Stonewall

Martin Boyce was part of the historic Stonewall Riots in June 1969. He recounts the events of that night in detail and reflects on how his actions changed America for generations to come. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

15 May 2024

36 MINS

36:48

15 May 2024

#1

Introducing: But We Loved

As a gay kid growing up Catholic, in conservative Texas, Jordan Gonsalves knew nothing about queer history. Now, as a journalist, he’s searching for the stories he craved when he was coming of age. Through intimate interviews with LGBTQ+ elders, Jordan uncovers the untold stories of queer history. And in the process, he discovers the role models he always needed and the wisdom they’ve been waiting to pass down. See [omnystudio.com/listener] (https://omnystudio.com/listener) for privacy information. ... Read more

01 Apr 2024

02 MINS

02:11

01 Apr 2024